Meditation – why fear it?
Inside our heads, there are two
voices, constantly maintaining a dialogue, and a third one is listening.
One is the proverbial old woman by
the entrance to your building (Russians will know exactly what I mean). She's
got glasses, a kerchief, and an opinion about everything. This is not how it's
done, and this is not how you wear it, and which idiot does that, anyway? This
voice is an old cynic, armed with a book of rules. Her name is Alte Yaga, and
she never shuts up, she is never calm. It's the voice of the mind, endlessly
repeating your "to do" list, worrying, directing, issuing commands,
and urging.
The other voice is a teenager. It wants,
and it sulks, and it scoffs, and rolls its eyes, and it demands. Why can't I
have it now? It's so unfair. Me, and for me, and now. And what about me? Welcome,
Ida. No, we're not looking, and you do look pretty.
The third voice isn't really a
voice. It's the Adult in us, that is supposed to perform the actions in our
lives. Whom do I listen to, Alte Yaga or Ida? One wants everything, the other
allows nothing. Sometimes, the Adult never develops, because those two fight
too loudly, and we alternate between the two modes, desires and impulses and
remorse, on repeat, for entire duration of our stay on this planet. Others will
give priority to one of the voices. Enter the Archetypes of Monk and Eternal
Child, aka Peter Pan.
How do we make sense of them?
For me, a person brought up on the
notion of the superiority of the Mind, the answer was not easy to accept. No,
our minds are not the ultimate sources of truth, on the contrary. The endless
list of human cognitive biases attests to the contrary. The Mind is but a took
in the service of the Soul. What do you mean by "We're not supposed to
think? How?"
We've got to silence them both to
hear the voice of our Soul. Sometimes, we don't even know that this voice
exists. It speaks in whispers.
The Soul knows what's right for
you, but you cannot hear her voice for the chatter of the mind and ego.
This is why we meditate. When we
breathe deeply and slowly, both the Mind and the Ego go to sleep, allowing the
voice of the Soul to be heard. The truths it speaks are usually the ones we
least expected to hear. Numerous people have mentioned their fear of
meditation, the fear of detaching from the body, or finding out things they'd
rather not know.
Just as a baby isn't afraid of his
mother nursing him, we should not be afraid to receive nourishment from our
Soul. She is there, waiting to be heard, waiting to help us make decisions, give
us perspective. When you re-surface, both Mind and Ego are calm, having been
shown their place. They honour the Soul and accept its verdict. The baby who is
nourished becomes a fully-functioning and capable Adult, and you grow, without
even realizing it. All you need to do is just breathe.
Let's try it.
